Saturday, April 16, 2005

"Did you truly believe you had the least hope against me, mortal?"

"...Am I not the great destroyer? Does my name not mean He Whose Limbs Shatter Mountains and Whose Back Scrapes the Sun?" (Iron Man 271)

I arrived from another world -- and I have roamed these lands for eons before your puny existence. Long have I slept and long have I waited. Now, Fin Fang Foom has been awakened from his slumber! Tremble before my might -- and my purple bikini underwear!

fff

And now, to imbed fear and awe in your insignificant souls, I will recite a poem:

FIN FANG FOOM
Out of my way
INSECTS
I am
FIN FANG FOOM
I offer no pity
no mercy
nothing but
DOOM

My slumber of 1,000 years
is THROUGH
There is nothing mankind can do
Beware the fury
of
FIN FANG FOOM

I will smash
I will crush
I will eat this whole country
I am unstoppable
So says the ancient and strong
FIN FANG FOOM

I dance on your corpses
your cities
your schools
Stomp you like grapes
as your bitter mortal blood
squirts between my toes
I am FIN FANG FOOM

There is no escape from
FIN FANG FOOM
I'll slay all mankding
I'll kill them real soon
They'll beg me for mercy
Though I'll give them none
For such is the way
of FIN FANG FOOM!

Fear me bitch.

4 Comments:

At 8:43 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

There are some days when I wonder why I am a such a dysfunctional loser. I look in the mirror filled with doubt and insecurity and I wonder why I was born such a worthless freak. Yes, it's true/ I hate myself.

Still, once in a while I see people post shit about dragons in comic books and "fin fan foom" as if it were the hippest thing around--- even adding credence to the hippety hop alterno-cool nature of a "badass" dragon with slang like: "fear me bitch".


It is in these rare moments when I truly see with unrivaled clarity the nature of this other's being, I smile a smile of contentment because I am pleased that I am nothing like this other. It;s as if I know with such certainty that I am so much better than this loser.

Thank you god.

 
At 8:48 PM, Blogger Jesus Henry Christos said...

it's officially time to kill yourself.

officially.

btw you bitch: you've had an open invite to post for almost a year now. i wonder how many camus fueled diatribes our readership could take before venting themselves similarly.

best regards,
the fakest nigga on earth.

 
At 9:29 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

there are times when a girl is far away and thin and i think she is hot. then i scurry up closer closer closer and look at her and realize she is ugly. that just happened to me.

camus? i hate the bastard.

i was going to kill myself about 3 months ago. and right before the moment of truth, i realized i wanted to jerk off first.

it is the only part of life i would miss. but perhaps the most important.

i do not jerk off to live.
i live to jerk off.

 
At 9:36 PM, Blogger Jesus Henry Christos said...

i'm going to go ahead and revoke your invite.

 

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