What do you call it?

I just wanted to take a moment and bring this blog back to its roots - juvenile jokes about nothing.

So here is my list of phases to be used when announcing to the world to hold all calls because you're going to deficate.

Gotta drop a deuce.
Gotta drop the kids off at the pool.
Gotta do some valsalva maneuvers.
Gotta pull some V's.
Gotta drop a bomb.
Doing a dirt.
Going to do some thinking.
Need some quiet time.

That's my short list. What's yours? Inquiring minds want to know.

Now if you'll excuse me, I've got to kill some kittens. More on that phase later.